My bones were too big for my child-sized body and they left me a topological map held together by battered skin. the worst kind of jigsaw puzzle, where all the edges look the same and the pieces crumble in your hands. i’ve never walked a straight line in my life, perpetually dizzy, perpetually bruied, i dyed myself purple-green around the edges; i walked into open doorframes when i didn’t hit the door itself.
(i lie down in the dirt and this time it’s on purpose. this time my hands don’t smell like metal from the monkey bars, this time it’s somewhere in the sun. I lie down in the dirt and look up towards the clouds i used to lose my head in, up towards the blue between, up towards the outline of the moon waiting on the stars to join it)
I grew up a power overload, too much motion and information and emotion writhing under the skin. i was a walking omen of my own future burnout; i got shivers down my spine and wondered who paced restless over my grave. passing graveyards held my breath back for a time but nothing could slow my mind, so wild and whirly i got dizzy just watching.
(I lie down in the dirt like the sun lies down all golden glory in the mountain horizon and plant my soul like a sapling, willing to stay still as long as it takes for it to grow. I lie in the dirt like a heads up penny. good luck, i say, as the wind blows cooler with the coming dark and something starts to grow in the dim glow of the stars)
LEAF SCAR // PD
